Moving is Hard

I grew up in the same house all my young life—until I got married.  I married a guy in the Coast Guard, which means we move every two to four years.  I have loved our life, the changes, the new sceneries, and the adventure of it all.  However, in all the adventure, moving is hard!  Not just the physical stuff, but also all the emotional and spiritual change that comes with moving.  Each of our moves has brought us a different set of blessings as well as a different set of challenges.  Looking back at all of them, I can honestly say I wouldn’t change our lifestyle for anything in the world.  Our family has been blessed to see and live places we never could have imagined.  Our life experiences have made us the family we are, but it didn’t come without sacrifice and loss.

            When Steve and I got married I was so excited to move, even if it was just from Houston, TX to Port Arthur, TX.  Since I had never moved before this was all exciting and new.  We were still close enough to family to get to see them whenever we wanted, but far enough away to experience our own independence.  After three years we were blessed to move to Panama City Beach, Florida.  I was beyond excited with the news, but never stopped to think how hard it would be to live so far from family.  The first time realization hit was when I found out I was pregnant with Lance.  Suddenly the worry and fear set in that we were going to have this baby alone.  I had been blessed to be at the hospital to see all of my nieces after they were born.  The hospital room was full of family loving on the moms and babies…and confused dads.  This is something I knew I would never have, and it stung a bit.  However, since I was in labor so long my mom did make it from Houston to Florida in time to see Lance being born!  I have some precious, precious memories of that time.  We lived in Florida for four years and made so many friends that became like family to us.  It was a hard place to leave, and we still long to go back there someday for more than a vacation.

            From Florida we moved back to Houston.  Shortly after getting there, Steve received the call that he was accepted to Officer Candidate School (OCS) and would have to leave in four days to go to New London, Connecticut for 17 weeks.  I was fortunate enough to be able to live with my parents during that time.  Eight days after Steve left for OCS his father passed away.  While this was a difficult season, I consider it a blessing that I was able to spend his last days at his side.  God has a way of putting us right where we need to be at just the right time and I am eternally grateful for that.  Once Steve got back we moved to Corpus Christi, TX.  We were still in Texas, but four hours away from family and friends.  During our 18-months living there we adopted Tony.  Again, since we were not in Houston we missed having the family around to help us as we navigated the road of having two kids coupled with the aspect of adoption and the fact that he was a difficult baby.

            After Corpus Christi, we moved to Summerville, South Carolina; about 20 miles outside of Charleston.  That was the farthest I had ever been away from my family, and the farthest north I had ever been.  I could no longer get to them in a days drive and that was a scary thing for me.  At this point, moving didn’t affect the kids too much.  Lance seemed to like the adventure and Tony was too young to get it.  Though I missed my family and friends terribly The Lord blessed us with wonderful friends that became family--the Janikowski’s.  I still love and miss them everyday!  I am thankful for social media because I get to keep up with them and their lives.   After three years in South Carolina we moved to Pembroke, Massachusetts while Steve worked in Boston. This was like no other place we had ever been before, and that was again scary to me.  This move was a little more difficult for Lance because he had friends he was going to miss, but he was excited about snow.

            Many of you know that Steve and I are people who like people.  In fact, we love people.  We love to be surrounded by people we love and cherish and share life with.  We were short on people in Massachusetts.  We were cold, lonely, homesick, and struggling to find our purpose for being there.  God taught us a lot about ourselves while we were there for our three-year assignment.  From there we moved to Stafford, Virginia.  This move was a little hard for Lance at first, but once we got to Virginia he settled right in and found friends immediately.  The great thing about the Coast Guard being so small is that we frequently get to live near some of the same people.  One of those families is the Fair’s.  We moved to Virginia at the same time and they blessed us by introducing us to their family and friends immediately.  We really felt loved and felt like we belonged there.

            It was in Virginia that we decided to become foster parents.  The Lord blessed us with a church family that demonstrated a heart for orphans, foster care, and adoption.  While we loved our friends, there just isn’t any way to replace the absence of family when making big life changes.  We had a total of eight foster kids and most of them never met a single member of our family, which just feels weird.  It feels especially weird because we are so close with our family and want to share every moment with them, and we do, but just over the phone and through social media.  So when we got the news that we were coming back to Houston, we lost our minds!  We just knew that everyone was going to be as excited as we were.  However, our boys weren’t quite on the same page.

            We lived in Virginia for four years.  Lance went to all of middle school and was just finishing his freshman year.  He made the varsity football team his freshman year and struggled to understand the gravity of Texas football.   For those of you that know Texas, you know that Texas football is a whole other beast.  Lance had made life-long friends in Virginia and he simply wasn’t ready to leave them, even if it was to live closer to family.  Tony struggles with change in general and he was not happy about leaving his school and friends either.  Though Steve and I knew the move to Texas was what we had wanted and prayed for, we had feelings of sadness too when we considered leaving our church family.  We really connected to the people of The Mount and still miss them greatly.  Steve is doing all he can to talk some of them into moving to Texas!  This was the craziest mix of feelings we had experienced in all of our years of moving.  To be so excited and so sad was a new emotion for our family.

            Well, the great news is that we are here in Texas and it is wonderful.  We love being so close to family and friends.  Our hearts and lives are simply overflowing with abundant blessings.  However, along with all of the blessings came growing pains, loneliness, hardships, hurts, and struggles.  I feel like we have finally gotten in the groove of things here and found great relationships outside of our family.  As excited as we were to move here, I have to say that this has been our hardest move to date, yet also our best move.  Thank God we were coming to Texas, because I’m not so sure we would have made it anywhere else…well, except Panama City Beach, Florida!  I don’t know what God has planned for us from here, but I do know it will all be perfectly planned by Him, and imperfectly lived out by us.  So for now, we rest in the arms of Texas and relax the seatbelt for a while…

Wonder Woman

For those that know me, you know it was just a matter of time before I figured out a way to put Wonder Woman in my blog.  There is a small chance I might be slightly obsessed with her—just a small chance!  I actually love super heroes in general; Wonder Woman just happens to be my favorite.  The question is; why do I love super heroes so much?  What is it about them that draws me in and enthralls me into their every story?  Each time a new super hero movie comes out I find myself excited with anticipation of the new story line.  My kids and I count down the days until the movie comes out in the theater, and then count down again till it comes out on DVD.  What is it about the super heroes and their stories that keep me coming back for more?

Well…I have actually put a lot of thought into these questions, probably more than I should.  In doing so, I have come up with many different answers.  I like action movies.  I love a hero.  A good rescue story keeps me on the edge of my seat with exhilaration and anticipation.  I get excited when the good guy beats the bad guy.  My heart longs to see people willing to sacrifice themselves for others.  I get goose bumps and warm fuzzies from stories of people overcoming hardships and turning them into blessings for others.  I am drawn to the ordinary looking person that has super human powers who uses them for the good of the people.  I get lost in these stories and they give me hope, warmth, and a sense that everyone can be saved.

Every super hero in the movies has to overcome some kind of hardship or obstacle. They use these things to turn themselves into a hero--a rescuer of others.  Wonder Woman was an Amazon princess who wanted to be a warrior, even though her mother forbid it, and left her family to come to earth.  Superman’s parents sent him to earth from his dying planet to save him before they died.  Batman’s parents were killed right before his eyes, and so were Robin’s.  Spiderman is an orphan who moved in with his aunt and uncle, and was bitten by a spider.  He received superhuman powers and strengths from that bite.  The list goes on-and-on with the hurdles and struggles these people had to face that helped them become the super heroes they are.  Yet, if you look at their alter egos, they are ordinary and plain.  No one would think that these people could be a hero…a savior.

As I look at their stories and my answers as too why I love them, I find a common thread: I love a SAVIOR!

I love my savior Jesus Christ so it is only natural that I would look for examples of saviors in movies and stories and life.  Jesus had obstacle after obstacle, unbeliever after unbeliever, hardship after hardship on His path to save the world, and yet He rose above them all and sacrificed Himself for all mankind to be saved.  This is the ultimate super hero story and my favorite one of all.  So, while my favorite super hero is actually Jesus Christ, I will still choose to love Wonder Woman.  A girl has to do what a girl has to do!

When looking deeper, the things that draw me to super heroes are actually the attributes of Christ that I hold so dear.  Super heroes sacrifice themselves to save people.  They save people no matter who they are or whether or not they are even thankful for the rescue.  A super hero has a sense when someone needs saving and will drop everything to be there.  Their powers are bigger than their human bodies and capabilities.  They look so ordinary on the outside, yet they are really so powerful.  In comparison, Jesus did sacrifice himself for all mankind.  He died on the cross for everyone; even those who choose not to believe or be thankful.  He knows who needs Him and is always there for each of us, no matter what.  His power was bigger than His human body; it was the power of God the Father.  He was an unassuming man who appeared to be ordinary on the outside, and yet He was actually the all-powerful God.

Please don’t misunderstand me; I realize that super heroes are not God.  They have faults, where Jesus had none.  Jesus is real, and super heroes are made up.  I get all of this for sure.  The point I am making is that I am drawn to things and people that remind me of Christ’s attributes.  I believe we are all drawn to those things, even the nonbeliever.  This is why we watch these movies and read these stories. This is why children pretend to be them and dress up as them.

I may not approve of the way these super hero movies are written or played out, but I do love the underlying message I find in them.  Story telling has long been a way of teaching morals and values to generation after generation.  I am not saying that super hero movies and stories teach the best morals, but the message in the story is still a good one.  Don’t let circumstances stop us from being all we can be.  People need to help people.  We can overcome obstacles and turn our hardships into blessings for us as well as others.  And finally, we all NEED A SAVIOR!  These are the lessons I will choose to learn from super heroes, for they immulate the ultimate savior, Jesus Christ.

This is, of course, my favorite Wonder Woman of all!

Best Friends

      Best friends are the best!  I don’t know how people go through life without one.  Most of us have good friends, and even great friends, but those who have "best friends" know what I'm talking about--there is a difference.  A true best friend knows more about you than anyone else and still chooses to spend time with you.  They not only choose to spend time with you, but they actually don’t feel complete without you in their life.  As if their life simply doesn’t work right without you in it.  A best friend feels what you feel and experiences what you experience, even if they aren’t with you physically when you are going through it.  This is the type of friend I refer to when I say “best friend.”

      I am blessed to have a best friend; someone who has been with me since second grade.  When you have known a person for that long it gets to a point that even if you decided you didn’t like them anymore, you are still obligated to be their friend simply because of what they know about you. They have way too much information on you to ever let them go (this is not my case).   If you are lucky, that person becomes so precious to you that you know you simply could not live without them (this is my case)!  We have known each other so long we can have an entire conversation without actually saying anything.  What I mean is, we share so many of the same memories that we can simply say, "Do you remember that time?", and the other one knows exactly what time is being referred to.  Here is what a conversation can look like:

      Me:  "Do you remember when we...
      Her:  "Then we went to the..."
      Me:  "But it was closed."
      Her:  "Oh my goodness, that was the funniet thing ever."
      Us:  <hysterical laughter>

      Our friendship has survived distance, a falling out, more distance, and extended periods of time of not seeing each other.  Yet through all of that, we have remained close and have been with each other through all the major milestones of life.  One of our most precious moments in my heart was being in the delivery room when her youngest child was born.  That is something I will cherish for all time.  Another one was bringing Tony home to my parent’s house and her waiting in front of their house with two or three large bags from Toys-R-Us.  These are moments that aren’t shared with just anyone outside of the family-tree.  As I am sure most of you know, family is more than just biological relation, and she is family to me!

      I was reading the book of Ruth in the Bible this week and weeping, which seems to happen every time I read it.  There is something so powerful about the relationship between Ruth and Naomi.  Ruth was willing to do whatever it took to stay with Naomi.  Naomi was so important to her she simply knew she had to be with her, to share her life with her, to follow her wherever she went.  “But Ruth replied, ‘Don’t urge me to leave you or to turn back from you.  Where you go I will go, and where you stay I will stay.  Your people will be my people and your God my God.  Where you die I will die, and there I will be buried.  May the Lord deal with me, be it ever so severely, if even death separates you and me’” (Ruth 1:16-17).

      The part that caught my focus this week was “your people will be my people.”  Since my best friend and I have known each other since elementary school we have had to live this part of the verse.   She is just as much a part of my family as my own siblings, and I am a part of her family as well. As we were dating we had to accept each other’s boyfriends and even each other’s friends.  Then came engagements and marriages.  We not only had to accept each other’s spouses, but they had to accept us as well.  When we get together we are a force to be reckoned with and can be quite overwhelming to be around.  We have been blessed that our spouses get along; most of our boyfriends did not!  Next came our kids, which of course we love and accept as our own and they all seem to love each other as well.  As a matter of fact, our oldest boys talk every week, even if it is just though Xbox Live.

      It is easy to overlook how blessed we are to have this lasting friendship and unbreakable bond between us.  There is not a day that goes by that she is not on my mind, in my heart, and embedded in my prayers.  There are few days over the years that we missed talking to each other, whether in person, over the phone, social media, and/or email.  The majority of my precious memories have her in them and I can’t imagine my life without her. In the movie “Runaway Bride,” Rita Wilson’s character says to Richard Gere’s character that it takes three people to maker her marriage work, her, her husband, and their therapist.  My best friend and I say something similar, but instead of saying therapist, we say each other.

      So this week I am thankful for Jennifer Dippel.  I am thankful for her heart, and that I have a home there.  I am thankful for her ears, and that they are always ready to hear me go on-and-on until I am done.  I am thankful for her arms and the warmth of their hugs.  I am thankful for her mind and the way it helps guide mine.  I am thankful for her mouth and the wisdom that comes from it.  I am thankful for her spirit, enthusiasm, and energy and how they affect me when we are together.   I am thankful for her laughter and how contagious it is.  I am thankful to finally live so close to her that I can randomly stop by for a visit for no reason at all.  And finally, I am thankful for our memories, the ones we cherish, all the ones we have forgotten, and the ones we wish we could forget and will never tell…anyone!

Fine Line

There is a fine line between being pushy and being encouraging, sharing and forcing, being a salesman and being annoying.  I struggle to find that line sometimes.  There are specific things I interpret as being pushy, but in reality it is usually my own conviction that gets to me.   Sometimes what I find as pushy is simply someone sharing their passion with others because they want them to enjoy the success or benefit.  Being honest, I am not a good salesperson.  I feel like I am being pushy and annoying each time I mention something I am selling.  I also struggle sharing about something I believe in if it requires help from other people.  Heck, I even feel weird when I share posts about my latest blogs, and I am not even selling anything!  I know all of this about myself, and yet I keep finding myself in positions where I have to sell something or enlist the help of others or advertise something.

I have taken on tasks and responsibilities lately that are requiring me to do these things I am uncomfortable with.  I have signed up to lead two teams at church, both of which I am going to be required to recruit people to help me.  I am fortunate that I go to a church that makes this process relatively painless.  Once I enlist people though, I will be responsible for scheduling and holding these people accountable to the established standard.  I am really good at doing things myself—asking for help, however, is not one of my strong traits.  I know God purposefully called me to these two teams not only serve Him, but to grow me as well.  I am mentally preparing myself for this challenge and growth-opportunity.  I am relying on God for His strength and I know He will come through for me.  “Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding” (Proverbs 3:5). I am actually looking forward to developing some new skills and creating a comfortable place within my discomfort.

Then…there is this other thing I have signed up for—this is the hard one for me!  I have signed up to sell a product called Plexus.  For those of you who don’t know, Plexus is a line of health and wellness products that is sold through independent distributors called Ambassadors.  Even telling you about this now, feels like a shameless plug. Some family members and my best friend have been using these products and selling them with improved health.  All of them have had great results with weight loss, pain reduction or elimination, stomach and gut issues subsiding, and some other general health issues that are improving or have completely been eliminated.  However, I was a little slow to get on the Plexus bandwagon.   Being a fairly healthy person, I do not typically battle with health issues or my weight, though in the past few years it is becoming more of a battle to manage my weight.  At first, I thought I didn’t need these products so I dismissed them.  While I conducted research and liked what I saw, I just wasn’t ready to dive in.

Well, a little over a month ago, I decided to start using Plexus.  I started with just one product,  gradually adding one at a time, and now I am using four and considering one more. Soon after I began using the products I decided to sign up to sell—I can’t believe I signed up to do this; this is so not me.  I am not one of those people who signs up to sell products.  But something here was different, I simply felt lead to sign up and the fact is, I truly believe in Plexus and all the things the products can and are doing for my health and the people I love.  Let me be clear, my struggle is not with what I am selling, it’s having the courage to sell the products to other people…especially people I know.  

I try to post things on social media because that is where I tend to share my life.  Plus, I know this is a great way to reach a large audience.  If Plexus can help even one more person to get healthy and maintain that health, then I just have to share about it, but each time I post something I feel guilty.  I stew and brew over the right wording and struggle with feeling like I am bothering people with these posts.  It’s like two forces pulling me in opposing directions.  On one hand, I love these products and truly want to share them with other people that I know can benefit.  On the other hand I don’t want to annoy people and make them feel like I am this crazy pushy sales woman that just won’t leave them alone.  In the end I just pray over my words, hit the “post” button, and hope for the best.  It is uncomfortable and weird, but I truly believe it is what I am supposed to be doing.

Now I am left wondering; why would God call me to things I am clearly uncomfortable with?  Why would He call me to something I absolutely know I am not good at?  Why would He call me to something that causes me such anxiety and stress? Perhaps all of that is the point.  To call me to the uncomfortable so I have to seek my comfort in Him.  To have me doing something I am not good at to develop new skills.  To teach me to give Him all of my anxieties, stress, and fears and allow Him to give me the strength I need for everything.  So, I am choosing to live out Psalm 56:3; “When I am afraid, I put my trust in you.”  I am feeling better already, maybe I will go type a post about Plexus…hmmm, perhaps I will pray first!  Such a fine line.

P.S.  As a side note, it took me about a week to stew and brew over these words to finally post it.  I am still a work in progress!