Tests

          Here at my house, it is testing time.  My oldest, Lance, is studying for finals this week.  Baby girl is going though a “boundaries” testing phase.  My husband and I are having our faith tested, especially in two particular areas.  Tensions are running high and the stress levels are off the charts.  It is interesting to watch how we each approach this testing time.  Well, except for Tony, he seems to be the only one who has managed to escape the dreaded testing—and I am envious!  He is just freewheeling and wondering what is going on with his crazy family.  Poor kid.  Or is he setting the example for all of us?  It is not often I get to be envious of Tony’s life with all of his struggles, so I am enjoying this time with his life being the only one that seems to make sense.

We all approach tests differently around here.  Lance’s approach is to study as little as possible then spend the rest of his time trying to convince us he’s got this.  He seems to think that a quick review and read through is all he needs to learn the information.  This would probably work if he spent less time socializing at school and more time learning—I wonder where he gets this trait?   He usually manages to eek by with decent grades, but there is the occasional shocking grade that is certainly a result of his study habits, or lack thereof.

Baby girl takes her kind of testing very seriously.  I tell people all the time, “she is two and she is good at it.”   She insists on trying out all of the most difficult 2-year-old traits…daily!  When she decides to test the boundaries she gives it all she’s got.  She tests with gusto!  She wakes up testing and doesn’t stop until she finally falls asleep.  Sometimes she is still testing in her sleep, as I hear her yelling, “no Mommy” often.  She does not take failure lightly and rarely concedes.  If this is any indication as to how she will take tests in school, we will definitely have an honor roll student on our hands.

Steve and I seem to switch roles back and forth during our times of testing.  Sometimes he is the strong one with untouchable faith while I am leaning on him or hiding in the bathtub.  While other times it is my faith that is standing strong while he is napping in his recliner to avoid the stress of it all.  Luckily we never seem to both be down at the same time.  There are times, however, when we are both strong towers of faith marching through our tests arm-in-arm shouting praises and watching the walls fall down.  Okay, perhaps the Jericho reference is a bit dramatic, but I believe there are no walls strong enough to stop us when the two of us are together and following God’s lead.  During our 19 years of marriage we have seen many walls fall down as we marched on through with the victory of Jesus leading the way.

During this particular time of testing, we seem to be switching roles often.  It seems like each moment is a new battle and we never know which one of us is going to be strong.  We have decided that we are not going to let satan steal our joy.  We have committed to praying every time we feel doubt, fear, or stress creeping in.  Yesterday was particularly rough and we found ourselves literally stopping in mid sentence to pray and rebuke satan.  Our conversations must have sounded so odd.  In fact, while on the phone with Steve, he started praying over me while in the middle of my sentence; we’re that serious about it.  I am thankful to have a man that I can pray with, be vulnerable with, and in times of weakness, lean on his strength.

I know we will see these walls of frustration fall.  We will see the roadblocks get blown away.  We will see this stress melt away leaving our joy intact.  Until these things happen, we are here, in the midst of the testing, praying our way through and looking for the light at the end of this very long tunnel.  We are also trying to take the time to be thankful that this too shall pass, for God says,

“For our present troubles are small and won’t last very long.  Yet they produce for us a glory that vastly outweighs them and will last forever.  So we don’t look at the troubles we can see now; rather, we fix our gaze on things that cannot be seen.  For the things we see now will soon be gone, but the things we cannot see will last forever” (2 Corinthians 4: 17-18).

We are also standing strong in our faith that we have nothing to fear as long as God is on our side.  “Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand” (Isaiah 41:10).

            So, whatever test you are facing, I encourage you to commit your struggle to The Lord and rest in the steering currents that He provides.  Oh, and listen closely, because there is lesson to be learned and story to be made.

This is Lance preparing himself to study!

Miracles

             Oh, how I have missed blogging lately!  I have had so much to say and no time to say it.  My plate has been full, but most importantly; it has been full of what God had planned for me.  I have said before that I am not a person who enjoys being busy, busy, busy, but I do love following God and sometimes that requires a little busy, busy, busy.  Lucky for me this busy season has come to an end and things are slowing down and getting back to the pace I enjoy.  I find that when I am busy doing God’s work, satan is his busiest trying to trip me and get in God’s way.  I have witnessed so many close calls, almost failures, and some mountains that were reduced to a mere stumbling block and able to be avoided.  I have seen miracle after miracle during this busyness and I wish I could share all of them in this venue, but I will settle for sharing a few.

            Most of what has made me so bust lately is coordinating our church wide serve day, which really ended up being a weekend full of citywide events and activities.  I am the coordinator of Cityserve at our church, which is easiest explained as a 6-tier focused local outreach ministry.  The church assembles to reach those in the areas of single parents, orphans, prison fellowship, schools, hospitals, and our city. There were times I was certain things were not going to come together, and yet, God was faithful.  I had to constantly remind myself that I was only responsible to do the possible; the impossible was God’s job.  The church had a booth in our local Christmas festival (which ran Friday through Sunday), we had our church wide serve day that Saturday morning until 1:00, and we had a float in the local parade Saturday evening.  All of these things were a first, not only for our church, but for me as well.  The day included eight different ways for our church to serve our city and they all happened simultaneously.  God really showed off for us and everything went smoothly with no major hiccups.  The cool news is that Citymark Church was voted the overall winners of the parade—a big deal for us float-rookies!  I wish all of you could have seen how much fun we were having.  We were able to touch so many lives as we committed to being the hands and feet of Jesus.  I am still in amazement that it all worked out, even when it looked like there was no way it would.  Looking back, it doesn’t even make sense how it all came together; that’s how I know it was all God!

            Part of our outreach was to love on a group of foster children with an ice cream social and giving them backpacks filled to the rim with necessities and gifts.  My friend Veronica led this team to great success!  It was so fun to watch.  This Cityserve project followed the weekend after the church-wide event because of scheduling conflicts.  Therefore, during the church-wide serve day, teams loaded the backpacks for the children and were even able to pack several extra for the facility to give out to future incoming children.  Then the ice cream party was the following weekend.  During these two weeks.  We witnessed miracle-after-miracle, but it was a specific event working up to the ice cream party that really impacted me and brought me to tears.  Veronica was working with some local vendors asking them to donate ice cream but was struggling to get commitments.  However, the day before the party they all came through for her, and it was amazing.  The ice cream had to be picked up Saturday morning so it took a few people to drive to each location collecting it all.  These vendors went above and beyond and provided not only ice cream, but bowls, toppings, cones, etc…  When someone from our church went to one of the stores to collect, the owner asked if he and his daughter could serve with us—I have goose bumps just typing that.  They were moved so much by the initiative that they felt called to join in!  It was amazing to see them there serving the children.  I believe they were blessed in return when they saw the joy on the kid’s faces as they enjoyed the ice cream they personally donated then helped actually serve to them.  There are few words to explain the awe and wonder of watching God at work—but outrageous generosity comes to mind!

            Now, in the midst of all of this greatness going on, satan was determined to get in the way and mess things up…again!  He was clearly having no luck affecting our church and God’s plan for us, so he decided to attack my husband and I personally.  First let me say this; God has been working on my husband and I with some financial obedience lately.  We have had some hard lessons, but the blessings that have accompanied these lessons have far outweighed the uncomfortable times.  My car was in the shop having some warranty work done so my husband gave me his car and he drove the loaner car, which happened to be a brand new Chevy Camaro.  I know, I know, what a sacrificial giver he is!  The day he was to return the car and pick up mine he stopped to fill up the tank and when leaving the gas station was broadsided by a car he did not see coming.  The other car hit him directly on the driver’s side door.  He had to crawl out the passenger side just to get out of the car.  He calls me from the side of the road:

            Steve: “I am ok.  I have been in a significant car crash, but I am ok.  I am standing outside of the car, and I am ok.  I think the car is totaled, but I am ok.”

            Me: “Are you sure you’re ok?”

Clearly this is a man who knows his wife very well and knows just how to tell her bad news.  Though I believe satan meant for this to be a mountain for us to try to climb over unsuccessfully, God was able to turn it into a minor stumbling block that we have been able to step over.  We will probably have to pay a deductible, which is going to hurt right here at Christmas, but God has got this.  We have been able to navigate through this with very little stress or worry, which is a huge miracle!  Oh, and the good news…God spared our personal property from damage and Steve sustained no injury!

            Just to make this story even crazier, when Steve was asked to preach at Citymark a few weeks ago, he spoke on this exact incident.  Here is how it happened.  Our pastor called Steve on a Thursday evening and asked him if he could preach the following Sunday.  In his sermon he actually talks about a car wreck and not looking back through the rear view mirror but to focus through the windshield where God can make change in your life—how prophetic.

Well, check out minute 17:00 – 19:00 of this video link (or watch the whole thing):

http://citymarkchurch.org/media/recent-messages/sermon/our-generocity-pt-4:-making-deposits-in-the-kingdom-of-heaven

After this, I told him to preach of lottery winnings from now on! 

            What satan means for harm, God can and will use for good if we will let Him in.  “You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives” (Genesis 50:20).  It is amazing to watch the hands of God at work right before your eyes.  God wants to do amazing things for each of us every day, we just have to get out of the way and allow Him access to our heart.  What miracle do you need today?  What miracle is God waiting to bestow upon you that you are missing because of stubbornness or lack of faith.  Let’s get out of God’s way today and watch Him do great things in and through us. 

Here is my man bringing God's word to our church family!  I sure love hearing him preach.

Moving is Hard

I grew up in the same house all my young life—until I got married.  I married a guy in the Coast Guard, which means we move every two to four years.  I have loved our life, the changes, the new sceneries, and the adventure of it all.  However, in all the adventure, moving is hard!  Not just the physical stuff, but also all the emotional and spiritual change that comes with moving.  Each of our moves has brought us a different set of blessings as well as a different set of challenges.  Looking back at all of them, I can honestly say I wouldn’t change our lifestyle for anything in the world.  Our family has been blessed to see and live places we never could have imagined.  Our life experiences have made us the family we are, but it didn’t come without sacrifice and loss.

            When Steve and I got married I was so excited to move, even if it was just from Houston, TX to Port Arthur, TX.  Since I had never moved before this was all exciting and new.  We were still close enough to family to get to see them whenever we wanted, but far enough away to experience our own independence.  After three years we were blessed to move to Panama City Beach, Florida.  I was beyond excited with the news, but never stopped to think how hard it would be to live so far from family.  The first time realization hit was when I found out I was pregnant with Lance.  Suddenly the worry and fear set in that we were going to have this baby alone.  I had been blessed to be at the hospital to see all of my nieces after they were born.  The hospital room was full of family loving on the moms and babies…and confused dads.  This is something I knew I would never have, and it stung a bit.  However, since I was in labor so long my mom did make it from Houston to Florida in time to see Lance being born!  I have some precious, precious memories of that time.  We lived in Florida for four years and made so many friends that became like family to us.  It was a hard place to leave, and we still long to go back there someday for more than a vacation.

            From Florida we moved back to Houston.  Shortly after getting there, Steve received the call that he was accepted to Officer Candidate School (OCS) and would have to leave in four days to go to New London, Connecticut for 17 weeks.  I was fortunate enough to be able to live with my parents during that time.  Eight days after Steve left for OCS his father passed away.  While this was a difficult season, I consider it a blessing that I was able to spend his last days at his side.  God has a way of putting us right where we need to be at just the right time and I am eternally grateful for that.  Once Steve got back we moved to Corpus Christi, TX.  We were still in Texas, but four hours away from family and friends.  During our 18-months living there we adopted Tony.  Again, since we were not in Houston we missed having the family around to help us as we navigated the road of having two kids coupled with the aspect of adoption and the fact that he was a difficult baby.

            After Corpus Christi, we moved to Summerville, South Carolina; about 20 miles outside of Charleston.  That was the farthest I had ever been away from my family, and the farthest north I had ever been.  I could no longer get to them in a days drive and that was a scary thing for me.  At this point, moving didn’t affect the kids too much.  Lance seemed to like the adventure and Tony was too young to get it.  Though I missed my family and friends terribly The Lord blessed us with wonderful friends that became family--the Janikowski’s.  I still love and miss them everyday!  I am thankful for social media because I get to keep up with them and their lives.   After three years in South Carolina we moved to Pembroke, Massachusetts while Steve worked in Boston. This was like no other place we had ever been before, and that was again scary to me.  This move was a little more difficult for Lance because he had friends he was going to miss, but he was excited about snow.

            Many of you know that Steve and I are people who like people.  In fact, we love people.  We love to be surrounded by people we love and cherish and share life with.  We were short on people in Massachusetts.  We were cold, lonely, homesick, and struggling to find our purpose for being there.  God taught us a lot about ourselves while we were there for our three-year assignment.  From there we moved to Stafford, Virginia.  This move was a little hard for Lance at first, but once we got to Virginia he settled right in and found friends immediately.  The great thing about the Coast Guard being so small is that we frequently get to live near some of the same people.  One of those families is the Fair’s.  We moved to Virginia at the same time and they blessed us by introducing us to their family and friends immediately.  We really felt loved and felt like we belonged there.

            It was in Virginia that we decided to become foster parents.  The Lord blessed us with a church family that demonstrated a heart for orphans, foster care, and adoption.  While we loved our friends, there just isn’t any way to replace the absence of family when making big life changes.  We had a total of eight foster kids and most of them never met a single member of our family, which just feels weird.  It feels especially weird because we are so close with our family and want to share every moment with them, and we do, but just over the phone and through social media.  So when we got the news that we were coming back to Houston, we lost our minds!  We just knew that everyone was going to be as excited as we were.  However, our boys weren’t quite on the same page.

            We lived in Virginia for four years.  Lance went to all of middle school and was just finishing his freshman year.  He made the varsity football team his freshman year and struggled to understand the gravity of Texas football.   For those of you that know Texas, you know that Texas football is a whole other beast.  Lance had made life-long friends in Virginia and he simply wasn’t ready to leave them, even if it was to live closer to family.  Tony struggles with change in general and he was not happy about leaving his school and friends either.  Though Steve and I knew the move to Texas was what we had wanted and prayed for, we had feelings of sadness too when we considered leaving our church family.  We really connected to the people of The Mount and still miss them greatly.  Steve is doing all he can to talk some of them into moving to Texas!  This was the craziest mix of feelings we had experienced in all of our years of moving.  To be so excited and so sad was a new emotion for our family.

            Well, the great news is that we are here in Texas and it is wonderful.  We love being so close to family and friends.  Our hearts and lives are simply overflowing with abundant blessings.  However, along with all of the blessings came growing pains, loneliness, hardships, hurts, and struggles.  I feel like we have finally gotten in the groove of things here and found great relationships outside of our family.  As excited as we were to move here, I have to say that this has been our hardest move to date, yet also our best move.  Thank God we were coming to Texas, because I’m not so sure we would have made it anywhere else…well, except Panama City Beach, Florida!  I don’t know what God has planned for us from here, but I do know it will all be perfectly planned by Him, and imperfectly lived out by us.  So for now, we rest in the arms of Texas and relax the seatbelt for a while…

Wonder Woman

For those that know me, you know it was just a matter of time before I figured out a way to put Wonder Woman in my blog.  There is a small chance I might be slightly obsessed with her—just a small chance!  I actually love super heroes in general; Wonder Woman just happens to be my favorite.  The question is; why do I love super heroes so much?  What is it about them that draws me in and enthralls me into their every story?  Each time a new super hero movie comes out I find myself excited with anticipation of the new story line.  My kids and I count down the days until the movie comes out in the theater, and then count down again till it comes out on DVD.  What is it about the super heroes and their stories that keep me coming back for more?

Well…I have actually put a lot of thought into these questions, probably more than I should.  In doing so, I have come up with many different answers.  I like action movies.  I love a hero.  A good rescue story keeps me on the edge of my seat with exhilaration and anticipation.  I get excited when the good guy beats the bad guy.  My heart longs to see people willing to sacrifice themselves for others.  I get goose bumps and warm fuzzies from stories of people overcoming hardships and turning them into blessings for others.  I am drawn to the ordinary looking person that has super human powers who uses them for the good of the people.  I get lost in these stories and they give me hope, warmth, and a sense that everyone can be saved.

Every super hero in the movies has to overcome some kind of hardship or obstacle. They use these things to turn themselves into a hero--a rescuer of others.  Wonder Woman was an Amazon princess who wanted to be a warrior, even though her mother forbid it, and left her family to come to earth.  Superman’s parents sent him to earth from his dying planet to save him before they died.  Batman’s parents were killed right before his eyes, and so were Robin’s.  Spiderman is an orphan who moved in with his aunt and uncle, and was bitten by a spider.  He received superhuman powers and strengths from that bite.  The list goes on-and-on with the hurdles and struggles these people had to face that helped them become the super heroes they are.  Yet, if you look at their alter egos, they are ordinary and plain.  No one would think that these people could be a hero…a savior.

As I look at their stories and my answers as too why I love them, I find a common thread: I love a SAVIOR!

I love my savior Jesus Christ so it is only natural that I would look for examples of saviors in movies and stories and life.  Jesus had obstacle after obstacle, unbeliever after unbeliever, hardship after hardship on His path to save the world, and yet He rose above them all and sacrificed Himself for all mankind to be saved.  This is the ultimate super hero story and my favorite one of all.  So, while my favorite super hero is actually Jesus Christ, I will still choose to love Wonder Woman.  A girl has to do what a girl has to do!

When looking deeper, the things that draw me to super heroes are actually the attributes of Christ that I hold so dear.  Super heroes sacrifice themselves to save people.  They save people no matter who they are or whether or not they are even thankful for the rescue.  A super hero has a sense when someone needs saving and will drop everything to be there.  Their powers are bigger than their human bodies and capabilities.  They look so ordinary on the outside, yet they are really so powerful.  In comparison, Jesus did sacrifice himself for all mankind.  He died on the cross for everyone; even those who choose not to believe or be thankful.  He knows who needs Him and is always there for each of us, no matter what.  His power was bigger than His human body; it was the power of God the Father.  He was an unassuming man who appeared to be ordinary on the outside, and yet He was actually the all-powerful God.

Please don’t misunderstand me; I realize that super heroes are not God.  They have faults, where Jesus had none.  Jesus is real, and super heroes are made up.  I get all of this for sure.  The point I am making is that I am drawn to things and people that remind me of Christ’s attributes.  I believe we are all drawn to those things, even the nonbeliever.  This is why we watch these movies and read these stories. This is why children pretend to be them and dress up as them.

I may not approve of the way these super hero movies are written or played out, but I do love the underlying message I find in them.  Story telling has long been a way of teaching morals and values to generation after generation.  I am not saying that super hero movies and stories teach the best morals, but the message in the story is still a good one.  Don’t let circumstances stop us from being all we can be.  People need to help people.  We can overcome obstacles and turn our hardships into blessings for us as well as others.  And finally, we all NEED A SAVIOR!  These are the lessons I will choose to learn from super heroes, for they immulate the ultimate savior, Jesus Christ.

This is, of course, my favorite Wonder Woman of all!